Civil Conversation

This is an article from the Commercial Appeal that showed up on my Facebook feed, and my answer's too long for the comment section, so I'm posting it here.

Why can’t we hold a civil conversation on race?

Because we ask, "Why can't we?" The question (intentionally ironic or not) is a roadblock. It sounds like we're already prepared to accept disappointment. 

If you'd like to talk about some of the things that are holding us back from the most necessary conversation we've never had (the one W E B Duboise tried to start over a hundred years ago), I might have a few useful insights.

Why we say can't

• Because a civilized conversation requires getting personal about our History and Heritage without being swift to defend the past with arguments that are older than the concept of racism itself.

• It would mean rewriting our learned memory, and developing a new narrative; one that admits History and owns the burdens of Heritage.

• We would have to stop using History to cast and deny blame, and start assuming responsibility for the Heritage that got us to here-we-are-now.

• We would have to get over our fear that our not-white neighbors want to put the shoe on the other foot, without expecting written assurances to the contrary, 'cause there's a lot of pissed-off brown people out there.

• It would require us to let go of the anger that blooms from the frustration of accepting the fact that we can't go on being Large and in Charge, and nor should we be. Nor should any other classified and cataloged group. This is America dammit, there's more than enough good to go around. Good grows here like fishes and loaves when we share it.

• We would have to accept the disparity between forgetting our anger and validating theirs.

• We would have to admit that we're part of the problem every time we insist we know the solution.

• We would have to stop expecting the government to fix everything, and try to get this whole We the People thing right.

I am sure there are other roadblocks that we've made for ourselves, but maybe there's a way to start removing some of these by asking:

How do we open a civil conversation on race?

No...really...How?

Peace Y'all